The disruption in memory processing that occurs with Alzheimer’s severely impacts all forms of communication. Even though someone with Alzheimer’s looks the same, the disease has them constantly moving between past and present. As a result, typical logic and reasoning to try and get them to start or stop doing something does not work.

In addition, as language is lost, a person with a progressive brain disease is more highly aware of their environment and the body language of everyone around them. Therefore, non-verbal communication becomes key. When the words you say no longer register, your facial expressions, body language, and tone of voice still do.

Since 90% of all communication is non-verbal, learning new ways to communicate means becoming more aware of these non-verbal communication queues and modifying them as necessary. What might that look like? For example, if you are angry or frustrated, be aware of how that shows on your face, in your tone of voice, or your body language. If you can’t modify your non-verbal communication in the moment, it is better to walk away or distract your loved one with something else, like a new activity. Otherwise, they will reflect your anger back on you.

We must also recognize that for someone with memory impairment, their behavior IS their main form of communication. As the disease progresses and verbal ability is lost, the inability to express wants, needs, and feelings often will come out in words which make no sense. But their behavior is telling you exactly what they need or are feeling. What might that look like? Someone entering the house, even if familiar, may agitate your loved one. There are so many reasons this may happen – not immediately recognizing the individual, or the person approaching and touching your loved one unexpectedly, are just a few examples. This can manifest itself as agitation that comes out as “Go home” or even “Go home your mother is looking for you.”

The words make no sense in this context, but the feeling of being threatened is real, and the emotion behind the words tell the story. Trying to tell someone that they know this person and that everything is okay will only upset them more. It would be better to have the person leave the house, possibly take off a jacket, and come back a couple of minutes later. When they re-enter, coach them to approach while facing the person and to not touch them. This may or may not work, but to ignore the feelings behind the words or to try and convince your loved one that they know this person is not giving thought to what they are feeling in that moment.

Behaviors and reactions don’t come out of nowhere. It is our job to play detective and figure out what is causing them. The cause can be environmental (too hot or too cold), a reaction to someone or an event, or a memory of a person or situation from the past.

Springpoint at Home’s Aging Life Care Advisors™/Care Managers have experience and training in working with older adults who have a progressive brain disease. They can help you navigate this new world. Our Certified Home Health Aides can be a source of respite while they are there helping your older adult.

For more information on Springpoint at Home and how we can help, please call 609-301-2101.